Hey Tired Yogi,
Did you know your brain’s job is to keep you safe—not to keep you happy?
And because it’s so good at that job, sometimes it does things that seem odd from the outside.
One of those things is this: your brain loves familiarity. It loves the status quo.
Even if the familiar thing... isn’t that great.
When I got my head around this, so much clicked into place.
It explained why I felt calm in chaos, but on edge when life was going well. Why I couldn’t enjoy good things—because I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I thought that if I just got what I wanted, then I’d feel happy. But the more things started going right, the more unsettled I felt.
I couldn’t figure it out. Why was it so stressful?
Why, when one part of my life was thriving, did I find myself sabotaging another?
It turns out that if you’ve lived with instability or struggle, calm and stability can feel alien—even threatening.
When your nervous system is used to being on high alert, peace can feel boring at first.
I had spent years trying to heal from my wounds, but I didn’t know how to hold joy.
When I started working on that—the capacity to hold peace, calm, ease—it changed everything.
It wasn’t instant. I think it’s a life’s work.
But practising how to experience joy and rest, not just survive pain, was a turning point.
And I’m sorry to report that what actually helped were the things I used to avoid like the plague.
Affirmations. Gratitude lists. Accepting compliments.
Not badmouthing myself (and I’m British, so let’s be honest: self-deprecation is a personality type).
At first it all felt cringey. Now it feels empowering.
Because healing isn’t just about holding pain—it’s about being able to feel joy again.
And we deserve that.
If you’d like to practise, I’ve got some gentle affirmations and meditations waiting for you in the meditation section.
Much Love,
Jo xx
Share this post